Okay. So I may have spoken a little too soon about speaking too soon. I know that sounds ridiculous, but everyone makes mistakes, right? I'm sure this sounds a bit cryptic, but since I don't think anyone actually reads the nonsense I write here, I think I'll be okay.
The rest of my vacation was fantastic. It had its ups and downs, but at the end of the day I know so much more than I once did. I'm no longer planning, but reacting. :) I've learned that I worry too much and I think too deeply. While that's not necessarily a bad thing, it can make situations much more complicated than they should be. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens next with Marcus and I; hopefully I'll find my happy ending by taking things one day at a time.
Anyhow, I think it's time for a snack and a nap--driving to and from the airport always drains my energy. My apartment seems too quiet now and I'm not sure what to do with myself since he's gone back to LA. This sounds cliche, but I can't wait to see him again. Hopefully our reunion will be sooner than later.
In My Ears: Jay-Z, 'Run This City'; The-Dream, 'Rockin' That Shit'; Hairspray: The Soundtrack to the Motion Picture
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
I've been thinking...
Perhaps I spoke too soon. We'll see how today goes.
In My Ears: En Vogue, 'Don't Let Go (Love)'; John Legend, 'Ordinary People'; Aaliyah, 'Rock the Boat'
In My Ears: En Vogue, 'Don't Let Go (Love)'; John Legend, 'Ordinary People'; Aaliyah, 'Rock the Boat'
Monday, July 27, 2009
"And I say the same thing every single time..."
I was definitely right. I'm having the time of my life on this vacation. Hanging out with Marcus every day has been truly amazing. Here's a little recap of what we've done so far:
Friday: Marcus's flight lands at around 9 p.m. I'm a teensy bit late picking him up because people from Bowling Green can't drive--traffic on I-65 between Bowling Green and Franklin was terrible. Eventually I make it there and I finally get to see him after almost two months apart. He looks fabulous (not that I doubted he would) and we talk a lot about his flight on the drive back to BG. Apparently the plane hit some pretty intense turbulence that he just kept reading through. I would have been screaming my head off and praying to Jesus to save my soul, but that's why he's the level-headed one in this twosome. I tell him a few things I have planned for us to do while he's in town (Dinosaur World, Mammoth Cave, going to Hodgenville to eat dinner with my family, etc.) and he just happens to notice a sign for Steak n' Sheak and asks if we can go there. Apparently they don't have Steak n' Shakes in California (or Waffle Houses either) and he loves both restaurants, so we stop at Steak n' Shake before turning in for the night.
Saturday: I wake up super early (as usual) and bake some biscuits for breakfast. We spend the day just hanging around the house, watching movies and talking. At one point I had to go into work to get my schedule, but other than that we just stay in. We do make it a point to go to Waffle House for lunch, where Marcus informs me that he could eat Waffle House twice a day while he's here. (For the record, I have absolutely no problems with that happening. I can get down on some chocolate-chip waffles, y'all.) Our server, Missy, is an absolute riot--she's cracking jokes and reading us fun facts about Waffle House and just being hilarious in general. I then challenged Marcus to eat 25 waffles in 10 minutes to beat the world record; he replies that he doesn't want to go into cardiac arrest over lunch, thank you. We head back to the house and just chill, watching Fun with Dick and Jane and just enjoying each other's company.
Sunday: This was the BIG day, people. I took Marcus to Hodgenville to meet my family. I got up early to go to bible study, and after making some baked pasta for us to eat later, we head north on I-65 toward my hometown of Hodgenville. I'm convinced my family will love him, but I still maintain a somewhat nervous silence on the drive--I'm hoping my family doesn't cut up too badly and embarrass me. (Not that I think they're embarrassing. I just know how Black people (and Elizabeth, my foster sister) can get in the presence of new people.) But the visit goes wonderfully. We eat my mom's awesome cooking--fried chicken, hashbrown casserole, fried cabbage, sweet corn, deviled eggs, and a double-chocolate cake for dessert--and I'm pleasantly surprised that no one is giving Marcus a hard time. In fact, they get along great. We start watching a marathon of America's Got Talent and have a good time laughing at some of the crazy things Americans are willing to do to get on television. On the drive back we rock out to John Mayer and talk about everything under the sun. I text my mom to let her know we made it back safely, and she texts back that she really likes Marcus. :) I rent Gran Torino from the redbox and that's the end of the evening.
Which brings us to the present. Today I'm planning on taking Marcus to Mammoth Cave and hanging out with my best friend/soulmate Katie when she gets back in town. Tomorrow is Dinosaur World and $5 all-you-can-drink at Brew Co. (I also may be getting my tattoo that day!). Wednesday, who knows--I just want to make sure I get to spend as much time as I can with him before he flies out on Thursday. I've had such a good time so far and can't wait to see him again (even though he hasn't left yet). I'll make sure to keep y'all updated on how the rest of the week goes. :) Have a good day!
In My Ears: Drake, 'Best I Ever Had'; Luther Vandross, 'So Amazing'; John Mayer, 'Free Fallin'
Friday: Marcus's flight lands at around 9 p.m. I'm a teensy bit late picking him up because people from Bowling Green can't drive--traffic on I-65 between Bowling Green and Franklin was terrible. Eventually I make it there and I finally get to see him after almost two months apart. He looks fabulous (not that I doubted he would) and we talk a lot about his flight on the drive back to BG. Apparently the plane hit some pretty intense turbulence that he just kept reading through. I would have been screaming my head off and praying to Jesus to save my soul, but that's why he's the level-headed one in this twosome. I tell him a few things I have planned for us to do while he's in town (Dinosaur World, Mammoth Cave, going to Hodgenville to eat dinner with my family, etc.) and he just happens to notice a sign for Steak n' Sheak and asks if we can go there. Apparently they don't have Steak n' Shakes in California (or Waffle Houses either) and he loves both restaurants, so we stop at Steak n' Shake before turning in for the night.
Saturday: I wake up super early (as usual) and bake some biscuits for breakfast. We spend the day just hanging around the house, watching movies and talking. At one point I had to go into work to get my schedule, but other than that we just stay in. We do make it a point to go to Waffle House for lunch, where Marcus informs me that he could eat Waffle House twice a day while he's here. (For the record, I have absolutely no problems with that happening. I can get down on some chocolate-chip waffles, y'all.) Our server, Missy, is an absolute riot--she's cracking jokes and reading us fun facts about Waffle House and just being hilarious in general. I then challenged Marcus to eat 25 waffles in 10 minutes to beat the world record; he replies that he doesn't want to go into cardiac arrest over lunch, thank you. We head back to the house and just chill, watching Fun with Dick and Jane and just enjoying each other's company.
Sunday: This was the BIG day, people. I took Marcus to Hodgenville to meet my family. I got up early to go to bible study, and after making some baked pasta for us to eat later, we head north on I-65 toward my hometown of Hodgenville. I'm convinced my family will love him, but I still maintain a somewhat nervous silence on the drive--I'm hoping my family doesn't cut up too badly and embarrass me. (Not that I think they're embarrassing. I just know how Black people (and Elizabeth, my foster sister) can get in the presence of new people.) But the visit goes wonderfully. We eat my mom's awesome cooking--fried chicken, hashbrown casserole, fried cabbage, sweet corn, deviled eggs, and a double-chocolate cake for dessert--and I'm pleasantly surprised that no one is giving Marcus a hard time. In fact, they get along great. We start watching a marathon of America's Got Talent and have a good time laughing at some of the crazy things Americans are willing to do to get on television. On the drive back we rock out to John Mayer and talk about everything under the sun. I text my mom to let her know we made it back safely, and she texts back that she really likes Marcus. :) I rent Gran Torino from the redbox and that's the end of the evening.
Which brings us to the present. Today I'm planning on taking Marcus to Mammoth Cave and hanging out with my best friend/soulmate Katie when she gets back in town. Tomorrow is Dinosaur World and $5 all-you-can-drink at Brew Co. (I also may be getting my tattoo that day!). Wednesday, who knows--I just want to make sure I get to spend as much time as I can with him before he flies out on Thursday. I've had such a good time so far and can't wait to see him again (even though he hasn't left yet). I'll make sure to keep y'all updated on how the rest of the week goes. :) Have a good day!
In My Ears: Drake, 'Best I Ever Had'; Luther Vandross, 'So Amazing'; John Mayer, 'Free Fallin'
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Friday, July 17, 2009
"Once again I ask too much of you..."
I'm fresh from a 7:30 p.m. showing of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince and let me tell you, that movie was AMAZING. It didn't follow the plot of the book exactly, but the acting was great and the cinematography was absolutely breathtaking. I'm probably going to see it again next week. That may sound like a lot, but it was spectacular.
So that was the fun stuff--yay. Now it's time for me to talk about some things that have been on my mind lately. One of the quotations from HBP actually inspired the post. During one of the pivotal scenes in the movie, Dumbledore says to Harry, "Once again I ask too much of you, Harry." Dumbledore did ask for Harry's complete trust, but did he ask too much of him? He did, after all, only have the best interest of the wizarding world (and Harry himself) at heart.
Which made me ask myself, do I ask too much of you? I'm thinking of one person in particular, and I don't believe the things I'm asking for are too much. I'm a pretty low-maintenance person, generally speaking. I like good food, good books, and good friends. I'm not the type of person who has to go out every night to see and be seen or have the latest outfit or gadget to be happy--I'm content with who I am and what I have. What I do ask for, though, is honesty...committment...affection...attention.
You don't have to be in my face all the time or call me every single minute, but I do want to know that you care enough to contact me every once in a while. It doesn't even have to be a long phone call--a simple text will do. I'm a firm believer that that simple things are the best things, and that the key to a healthy relationship (romantic or otherwise) is communication. My communication skills are what I'm most proud of about myself, and I only expect from others what I expect from myself.
Do I think I'm asking for too much? No, I honestly don't. But I do feel that honesty, committment, affection, and attention are things that I deserve. No longer will I settle for anything less.
So that was the fun stuff--yay. Now it's time for me to talk about some things that have been on my mind lately. One of the quotations from HBP actually inspired the post. During one of the pivotal scenes in the movie, Dumbledore says to Harry, "Once again I ask too much of you, Harry." Dumbledore did ask for Harry's complete trust, but did he ask too much of him? He did, after all, only have the best interest of the wizarding world (and Harry himself) at heart.
Which made me ask myself, do I ask too much of you? I'm thinking of one person in particular, and I don't believe the things I'm asking for are too much. I'm a pretty low-maintenance person, generally speaking. I like good food, good books, and good friends. I'm not the type of person who has to go out every night to see and be seen or have the latest outfit or gadget to be happy--I'm content with who I am and what I have. What I do ask for, though, is honesty...committment...affection...attention.
You don't have to be in my face all the time or call me every single minute, but I do want to know that you care enough to contact me every once in a while. It doesn't even have to be a long phone call--a simple text will do. I'm a firm believer that that simple things are the best things, and that the key to a healthy relationship (romantic or otherwise) is communication. My communication skills are what I'm most proud of about myself, and I only expect from others what I expect from myself.
Do I think I'm asking for too much? No, I honestly don't. But I do feel that honesty, committment, affection, and attention are things that I deserve. No longer will I settle for anything less.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
...or should I just keep chasing pavements?
I have to ask this before my head explodes from frustration. Why is it that once you get in a relationship with someone, everyone in the free world suddenly wants to get all flirty with you? I honestly don't get it. I've been single for who knows how long, waiting for someone to pay me attention, then I get a boyfriend and BAM! Ashley's the hottest thing on the block. It just doesn't make sense, people.
But now that I've vented a bit, I'll let you know about the other events taking place in my life thus far. I'm officially leaving Victoria's Secret. I don't want to, but I've got some other opportunities that I want to take advantage of right now. Hopefully one day I can come back to the company, but for right now I think I'm doing the right thing. I'm really excited about my new job and will definitely keep you updated on how it goes once I officially get started.
On the personal side, the male species has taken a spontaneous interest in me as of late. Who knows why, really. I'm kind of into it, but mostly just confused. Am I emitting some sort of pheromones or something? Anyway, Marcus will be here the last week of this month to visit. I'm really excited to see him, but I can't lie--this long-distance thing has been really hard. Maybe it will get better after I see him again, but I'm not the type of person who can build a relationship on occasional text messages and phone calls. But I'll think about all that once he gets here; we'll talk and see if we can work things out.
Other than those things, nothing major has been happening. I go to work, hang out with friends, and play The Sims 3 WAAAYY more than I should. I can't complain about life though--things are going pretty well. If things pop off, you'll be the first to know. Later.
But now that I've vented a bit, I'll let you know about the other events taking place in my life thus far. I'm officially leaving Victoria's Secret. I don't want to, but I've got some other opportunities that I want to take advantage of right now. Hopefully one day I can come back to the company, but for right now I think I'm doing the right thing. I'm really excited about my new job and will definitely keep you updated on how it goes once I officially get started.
On the personal side, the male species has taken a spontaneous interest in me as of late. Who knows why, really. I'm kind of into it, but mostly just confused. Am I emitting some sort of pheromones or something? Anyway, Marcus will be here the last week of this month to visit. I'm really excited to see him, but I can't lie--this long-distance thing has been really hard. Maybe it will get better after I see him again, but I'm not the type of person who can build a relationship on occasional text messages and phone calls. But I'll think about all that once he gets here; we'll talk and see if we can work things out.
Other than those things, nothing major has been happening. I go to work, hang out with friends, and play The Sims 3 WAAAYY more than I should. I can't complain about life though--things are going pretty well. If things pop off, you'll be the first to know. Later.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Oh, shit.
I'm in a pickle now. It's funny how life can get REALLY complicated all at once.
More later.
More later.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Something new...
In the "Wind"
dark-skinned scarlett
desperately seeking
always watching
wondering
searching--she knows what she wants
just one look
the tiniest taste
testosterone laced
approval
savors each glance
each smile
imagines fairy tale endings
family photos with
both parents present
something so different from
her own
she reads the southern belle bible
taking her place under parisols
wearing ball gowns, dancing reels
not under scorching georgia suns
planting cotton, plowing fields
identifies with the protagonist
feels the craving to crush male hearts
in her hands
whatever it takes
no matter the stakes
her body on display
a southern belle simper on her face
modern day whale bone stays
the push-up bras
low-cut tees
all to fill her tragic need for
someone
anyone
to notice her
dark-skinned scarlett
desperately seeking
always watching
wondering
searching--she knows what she wants
just one look
the tiniest taste
testosterone laced
approval
savors each glance
each smile
imagines fairy tale endings
family photos with
both parents present
something so different from
her own
she reads the southern belle bible
taking her place under parisols
wearing ball gowns, dancing reels
not under scorching georgia suns
planting cotton, plowing fields
identifies with the protagonist
feels the craving to crush male hearts
in her hands
whatever it takes
no matter the stakes
her body on display
a southern belle simper on her face
modern day whale bone stays
the push-up bras
low-cut tees
all to fill her tragic need for
someone
anyone
to notice her
Thursday, July 2, 2009
The (second) wait is over!
The Sims 3 finally came in today and it...is...AMAZING. That's all I can really say.
I'm working tomorrow and Saturday, but I'm off all day Sunday. Tentative agenda for my day off: Bible study, church, The Sims 3, trying out a new recipe, The Sims 3, paying some bills, and The Sims 3. I can't wait.
(Look for more--including more poetry--in the near future. I've been feeling inspired, but just haven't had time to put pen to paper yet. Happy Fourth!)
I'm working tomorrow and Saturday, but I'm off all day Sunday. Tentative agenda for my day off: Bible study, church, The Sims 3, trying out a new recipe, The Sims 3, paying some bills, and The Sims 3. I can't wait.
(Look for more--including more poetry--in the near future. I've been feeling inspired, but just haven't had time to put pen to paper yet. Happy Fourth!)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)